Keeping it real ...

So,it's midnight.I'm tired.And Joe ... he just went to bed.Yep,my 6 1/2 year old just went to bed.

Have you ever watched "SuperNanny"?We use to occasionally.Until we realized,we so could go on that show.Life with Joe would make us shoe in's for sure.We stopped watching after one particular episode.A family,had a little guy,about Joe's age and he was,how should I put this, perhaps "difficult", seems the most gentle.The striking resemblance to our family life with Joe, was bedtime.Once that little guy was put to bed,I believe he was out something like 80 plus times.No joke.Bedtime,and I use that term loosely,took like over two hours.Insane,isn't it?But in that episode,we saw our lives.Parents who did most everything right.Disciplined with love,listened,nurtured,the whole nine yards.But no matter what you did,or how you did it,the end result was usually the same.Because,in the end,it so isn't about discipline or lack there of.It is about the child and what goes on in the head of a constantly in motion child.A child who's body and mind,cannot find common ground.And when you have a child like that,life is challenging.Especially for the child.And as long as we are keeping it real,sometimes for the parents as well.

Joe has always,always been this way.Yes,even as a baby.No lie.No exaggeration.A diagnosis of severe speech apraxia paved the way for what was to come.Today we have the most amazing little guy.Funny.Like hilariously funny.Supersmart.As in scary, super smart.As well as and a very sweet little guy who now carries a few diagnosis' in his very own medical portfolio.Some I sit better with than others.All of which, make me yearn to help him.Even and most especially on the days when we both find ourselves at our wits end.

A child like Joe has this ability to change the tempo of the entire house.For the good and the bad.All of us have come to an understanding that Joe,on most days,just cannot help himself.It is strictly a wiring thing.As complicated and as simple as that.And if we can come to accept that Joe,cannot help how he is,any more than Miss Zoey can,than we will all fare better.Does that make it any less frustrating?Sometimes, no.On those days,I go to bed certain that my mother of the year sash will not be coming.I am but one person.Trying,trying,trying to give my all to each of my children.Big and small.Each with needs that differ from the other.None two the same and me,the last time I looked,sometimes just holding on by a thread.But I'm hanging.Haven't dropped into the dark abyss... yet.A running joke around here is that the old gene pool was just slightly depleted with each new addition.Humor around here helps.A lot.

Back to Joseph... I have been also know to say that I often feel much more equipped to handle Zoey and all of her needs than I do Joe.On days like today,that scares me.I don't mind saying that.Little minds,especially complex,still changing and evolving minds are kind of scary.And tonight,As Joe came down for oh,say the 20th time,I watched that body,jump,dance,literally bounce off walls and I felt sorry for my little man.And helpless.

Tomorrow will be interesting.I most likely know how it will go down.Same story.Different day.He will wake in the morning,ready to hit the world,until right before school at 9am, he will most likely hit a wall.We will manage to, reluctantly on his part,make it out the door to school.He will find his way through the school day.Come home.Crash.Sleep too long and then,the evening will be a repeat performance of tonight due to the long nap, except with fatigue being the wild card in how agreeable,obedient,and edgy his demeanor will be.Or rather, not be.

My poor guy.And I really mean that.Unless you have a Joe at your house,you will be absolutely clueless to what I am talking about.But if you do,well, you are most likely just nodding your head in sympathetic agreement.

Got to get to bed now, because,trust me on this,even though Joe went to bed at close to midnight,he still will be up around 3 am.In our bed.Possibly asking for a drink,going to the bathroom or perhaps asking me a question that is still whirring around in that ever spinning mind of his.

Just keeping it real for you all, as in this house, we are nothing if not real or is that surreal... hard to say.