Monday, May 5, 2008

Roller Coasters and Sleeping Beauty

A few weeks back I responded to a post by our blogger friends an ocean away. Zoey's little friends mom, commented that she felt that she was already riding a roller coaster, when asked by one of her sons if he could ride one one day. I was immediately compelled to respond as I have come to  know a little about these types of roller coasters of late. My response did not take long to write as I wrote directly from my heart, one mom to another, riding the very same type of roller coaster. I especially thought back to when Zoey was in the NICU. I could be heard on occasion saying "Stop the NICU roller coaster, I want to get off!". I still feel I am riding a roller coaster. Different coaster, same unpredictable ride. I have always disliked roller coasters, ALOT! I am looking more at this point for perhaps something not as wild. Maybe a merry-go round would be nice! I asked permission from our friends to post this because as much as they are my words, my comments are actually meant for them. A personal, private response in a very public forum. If that makes any sense? I never comment unless I feel it heart and soul and mean it heart and soul. I never comment for the sake of commenting. I never want to come across as cliche or pat. Only with sincerity and conviction. Heart to heart. So here it is. And in the process of posting it, if it speaks to someone else then I will be happy. Happy knowing that the precious little extra time I actually have, that I have poured into this new found blogging thing, has not been in vain. Maybe there is actually value to it.
When this roller coaster began, it began it's ascent to places filled with twists and turns we had no idea about. But it began it's  climb nonetheless and was filled with unexpected highs and lows which often left us mouths wide open wanting to scream but unsure if even a sound would be made or whether anyone would even hear us. We held our breathe and at times we were able to level off a bit, feel the wind against our faces and gaze out at the beauty that surrounded us. But just as we caught our breathe another steep drop came upon us, one again unexpected and one that left us gasping for air, asking, pleading, to be let off. The great thing about it is, that as we look around us we are surrounded by others riding the coaster right along with us. All filled with the same fear. The great thing also is that the ride will end and waiting at the end are all the people who love us who will be ready to take our hand and lead us to a different sort of ride. They will say ...." We know this ride has been difficult, we know at times this ride has made you literally sick to your stomach, we know you are ready to get off. We are here for you, ready to lead you to the next ride and because of the roller coaster ride you just rode and SURVIVED, you will be able to see all the magic that awaits you. You will be able to appreciate the new ride far better than most." And one day you may be able to look back and say with pride, filled with gratitude and utter ever so softly, I made it. I rode that roller coaster and made it.

* Zoey just loves her hammock. She is sleeping better. Maybe 1 1/2 to 2 hrs at a stretch at night. Mark checked on her tonight and this is what he found ........ he dubbed this photo "Sleeping Beauty" Her O.T. loves the hammock too as she feels it keeps her nice and compact and her arms and legs close to her body. Otherwise some of these little ones tend to fling them too much out to their sides. I think all in all, a good idea for the princess!

1 comment:

Dawson said...

You guys are such a blessing and we just love checking in and seeing how zoey is doing. Hope she is loving the Amby bed. Praying for you guys