The beauty of our days ....

One week.That's how long we have been home already.The days are going far too fast and I know Tuesday will be here before I know it.It has been so easy to fall back into routine of everyday life.Although due to Zoey's compromised immune system we are housebound and our routines revolve primarily on our daily lives within these walls.But I am not complaining.I am instead cherishing.Being home has lent itself to a few minor breakdowns.From me.Nothing too extreme.Just the reality of our life and the road ahead and the uncertainty that it holds.Last night as I went to bed I stood over Zoey's crib and just watched her breathe.I marveled in the size of her body and how fully she fills the space nowadays.Mark stood with me and I started to cry.I spoke what did not need to be spoken ... how much I loved her.He said ... we all do.To which I replied ...what if that's not enough?Knowing as those words left my lips how silly they were because how we all wish it were as simple as just loving them.So many families would not be where they are if the beauty of loving these children were all it took.I climbed into bed and out stretched my arm into the crib.For a moment wanting to selfishly pick her up and just hold her and rock her.I let her sleep.I gave into my own exhaustion.My dreams were of the hospital variety last night.Nothing I could vividly remember.Just the hospital.Our second home and a place that holds such a large portion of my heart nowadays.Not only for what it means to Zoey and her journey but for the families and children that I think about and pray for everyday.Their faces imprinted on my heart ... forever.For now,today we bask in the beauty of these days.The beauty of Zoey.Watching her take in every aspect of her surroundings.I see this new light about her and I am amazed that such growth,both physically and cognitively has seemingly taken place during what has been one of the most difficult onslaughts to her tiny body yet.She is a warrior in every sense of the word and I tell her daily that she is the bravest girl I have ever,ever known.Tonight I say some extra prayers for strength for some other tiny warriors that are in some very pivotal moments of their battles.For Thomas,and Luke,and Madison and Gavin ... we are so proud of you and ask that God continue to watch over you and bring to you and all who love you,peace and grace in the days ahead.Thank you to all of you for your daily check ins. We continue to be awestruck by the outpouring of love and support.All of it lends light to the beauty of our days.

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