Wednesday, February 4, 2009
"My grace is sufficient for you,for my power is made perfect in weakness."2 Corinthians 12:9
It has been a heck of a couple of weeks up here on 4East.A roller coater of emotions.Emotions based sometimes in our own fears but most definitely more so for other families trying so desperately to navigate through this new road they have found themselves traveling.Heartbreaking.I need to take a moment and mention the selfless nurses and PCSA's that work our floor.They gracefully and professionally and most lovingly give to us daily.They flip,how they do it I have no idea,from one extreme situation to another.They compartmentalize their emotions,at least in front of us and balance clinical and humanness seemingly effortlessly.I could never repay them for the selflessness by which they devote themselves to our children and I could never thank them for loving the hardest floor in the hospital so much so that most would say they would not choose to be any where else but on our floor.So any of you darling nurses reading this .... thank you on behalf of Miss Zoey Grace.As for Zoey ... doing her thing.The last few days you could really see the need for fresh blood.Her hemoglobin was down to 7.2 today(normal 11 and above) and that bought us a 4 hour blood transfusion.What a difference some fresh red cells can make.By the time I left this evening she had little rosy cheeks once again.No need for platelets this round.She did drop to under 5 thousand though.Normal is 150,000 to I think around 400,000.So they were scary low.But since she had no active bleeding,nose,ears,gums,we held off.Today her platelets jumped to 27,000 so I think we made the right decision holding off on the platelets.Too many platelet transfusions and the kids can get to a point that they basically become immune to their purpose and trust me,with,God willing, only 2 round left to go,we don't want her to become refractory,or stubbornly resisting their benefit.Zoey continues to amaze us.Truly amaze us.Her strength and courage and resiliency shine even brighter with each passing day and each passing round.She too, seemingly effortlessly, goes about her day.She takes her lead from those amazing nurses I suppose ... or maybe it's the other way around.The rest of us are holding up.Minus a breakdown from Jake tonight.Yes,Jake.My even keel,never sweats it,Jessica clone.My never throws a fight boy,threw a doozy.All over the lunches Mark and I make him.It all started when he figured out he missed hot pizza lunch today.Well it was all over then.He said that he eats the most boring lunches while everyone else gets "good stuff."Good stuff definition:fruit roll-ups,gushers and sour patch kids.Aren't I just the crappiest mom ever?He went on and on and I so wish I had a tape recorder.This all began right at bedtime.At one point I was reading a book called "Muncha,Muncha,Muncha".WELL,you should have heard him "Did you need to read that book ... It reminds me of food.And it reminds me that I will never,for my whole life,ever have a good lunch.Ever."All said with a dramatic voice of indignation and ... a lot tears.I tried not to laugh but ... Joe and I couldn't help it.Jake would find no sympathy in Taylor.I think she said something along the lines of :It was exactly the same for me growing up so oh well."Care to chime in here Jess and Caitlin?Well anyway,for Jake to have a meltdown means he's growing weary of Round 3 just like the rest of us.Day 17 tomorrow.Maybe by the end of next week we can find our way home.Until then we just pray that Zoey continues on this current path.We pray she can stay fever free and that her little body kicks into recovery sooner than later.And we pray for the 4th floor warriors and this week ... never more fitting.The laundry buzzer is sounding and I still have a load or two left.I leave you with a few pictures of the last couple of days.Today the Dodger's came calling.Highlight of a lot of the kids day and dare I say, parents as well.I wish I had my camera going when they were with her.Their publicists got incredible pictures as Zoey was definitely her charming self.They signed a hat for her and left a goodie bag that I suspect the boys will have to fight over.Another highlight of Zoey's weeks have been when the music people come by.They come mainly with guitars and Zoey just loves them.Absolutely loves them.She bounces and moves and smiles and they end up lingering a little longer with her.We also have volunteer readers that come throughout the week and Zoey adores them as well.Books and music.Two of her most favorite things.We are forging ahead.Hopeful and always prayerful that Zoey stays the course.Our faith seldom ever wavers in Zoey's ability to beat this thing.We remain confident that she will overcome this just as she has done every other obstacle placed before her.However,in our moments when we have grown weary and doubt and fear creep in, we ask God to continue to bring us His ever present grace when we most need it.Which,in the case of the last week means: He's been working overtime.