To the Max ....

Each evening this week, as I sit and read through the postings of all my friends,leave my comments,say my prayers for them,I go to post here and I go blank.Totally and absolutely blank.Not that there aren't things to blog about but rather blank because there is SO much to blog about.My mode of operation in my old age, when I am over whelmed,is to shut it down.Now I don't mean actually shut down my body because that is entirely impossible for me.I do not stop.Ever.And that's not exactly a good thing.As I wrote to a blogworld friend this evening,my type A personality doesn't allow me to really wind down or give into naps or resting or sometimes stopping to even eat.My saturated mind is much the same except for the fact that I have been blessed by the ability,no matter how entrenched in stress that I am, that my mind can and does turn off and I sleep like a rock.That blows my mind as I have a serious issue with anxiety and catastrophosizing things when things in life are at an all time emotional high.By shutting down I mean that I put things off for a bit,push it away, hoping it will go away or just placing in order those things that have to get done, with those things that can wait.Not all bad when it comes to finding methods of dealing with things actually.But a complete 180 to how I have normally cycled through life.So,because there is so much going on,physically and emotionally here,I have put off writing.Tonight is going to be fairly unorganized and random and pretty much all over the place.I'll start with me,which is not normally where I start and who knows,I might just get going and end there for the night as well.The stress of the last 9 months on my body has just been kicked up a notch.You see I have this pesky little heart thing.Revatively benign in most situations except for the fact that I have been having them while running.A trip to my favorite resident cardiologist,followed by a 24 hour holter monitor and a few EKG's revealed a bit more.A have something called a moderate QT wave.Now in the past,due to low potassium, I had Long QT syndrome.Which thankfully,with some supplements brought that back to a semi normal range.Because,in plan and simple terms.Long QT can be deadly.Now because I take a diuretic,for my Meniere's, which depletes potassium,I stand the chance of getting into some serious trouble.If I ate right and drank properly and wasn't in the state of mind I find myself in as of late,that,coupled with the Marathon,wouldn't be a big deal.But his concern is this:I push myself, due to the aforementioned type A personality,train like crazy for the marathon,take care of all that I have to take care of,and forget to take care of me.That combination could have huge consequences.Doctors recommendation,no marathon.My decision,I don't know.I truly do not know.All I know is that I do believe I am on the brink of being completely maxed out.As for the rest,the week shake down looked much like this:Jessica finished her CNA course and is looking for a job and making a decision on where to apply to nursing school.UCLA has a new masters program that is looking appealing to her and she is going to check deeper into that.Matt has is EMT certificate and his special ambulance driving license and has started some of his fire classes.Caitlin and Danny are doing fabulous.In the grove of parenthood and balancing school and a job,beautifully.We only wish they were closer in distance to us.Taylor is settled into Pepperdine and has a wonderful roommate.Her original roommate decided not to come about two weeks ago and as this world goes,the most amazing thing happened.A very sweet mom from the Dallas area happened upon my blog a while back.She has a 13 year old named Grace that happens to have Down syndrome.She is in fact a twin.After following us and praying for us she realized we both had girls going to Pepperdine.Both had already committed to other roommates but the strange turn of events found Taylor and Mackenzie now roommates!They are perfect together.Right down to both suffering from frequent debilitating migraines.They get each other and Kelly,Mackenzie's mom,feels such peace knowing we are here and that Taylor is there to watch over and understand what Mack is going through.A true blessing.The boys started school.None too happy.Wanted to hold on to summer a bit longer.As did I.They seem to be doing alright and I haven't heard from Joe's teacher so that alone is positive.And Zoey,she is Zoey.Her frustration at not being able to convey her needs and wants is picking up as is her frustration in not being able to get down and just go when we are out.She wants to be let down and it just can't happen out in the world.Can you see it?Zoey,rolling along the side walk.We just have to find a way to get her participating in her world.The week had tons more in it,culminating in Marks sister Lisa and her beautiful daughter Michelle coming for a visit today.We will try and pack in some fun stuff,which just might mean a trip south to visit the darling little Charlie.That's all I've got for tonight.If your still with me,thanks for hanging and thanks as always for your continued love,support and prayers.

*Miss Zoey getting to know and loving on her,never have met,lovely Aunt Lisa and the very sweet cousin Michelle.