Friday, November 2, 2012

Gratitude. Day 2. Employment ...

It is no secret to those closet to me, most especially my husband, that I have a love/hate relationship with his job. In fact, I have been heard, on many occasions, to say that if I were to sit down with a young woman who was involved with someone in my husbands line of work, I would say, " Run. Run very far and very fast, away." And there truly is a measure of truth to my feelings in that statement. There really is.

Mark is in the television industry here in Hollywood. And as I have mentioned numerous times, that life is far from glamorous. The hours are ungodly. Life is dictated by deadlines, endless changes and airtime. And clients could care less about your home life and responsibilities.They need to get their shows done and that, that I understand. I would also venture to say, no I know for a fact, that Mark and I are the exception within his working community. You have many people who are single. Or maybe married to someone in the business. And certainly the size of our family, rivals most anyone in his circle. And the complexities to our family unit only compound the uniqueness of it. His career is very stressful on marriages and family life, to say the least.

Through the years, we have never, ever sat down and  had family dinners together. Mark has never been able to coach a team. And yesterday for instance, as I picked Joe up from soccer, I looked around and I was the only mom doing carpool. That is the way it has always been since we had our first child 25 years ago. And one of the saddest reality checks as to the toll his work can be on us all, came when Caitlin was about 10. We were driving in the car and out of the blue she says, " Remember when we didn't know who our dad was?" Broke my heart and tore Mark's into pieces.

But, with all that said, the end result is, Mark has a job. A really good job. A job that he loves. A job that he is dedicated to and is respected tremendously for. I have been blessed to be a stay home mom from the moment we brought our first child home from the hospital. I have never lost sight of that gift. Over the last few years, as the our economy has spiraled to the state it is and the unemployment rate has surged to where it is at, I am grateful for the security of my husbands job and the benefits that have come with that employment.

And as Mark begins his newest show, 'The Biggest Loser", the first week in December and I roll over in the wee hours of the night and he is not there, I will revisit this post and remind myself of my gratitude for my husband job. I can't promise that that gratitude will always help me through the missing of having a partner to help parent in the difficult moments with the kids or during the times of missing the companionship that comes in the quiet, lonely times, but I will try. I really will. 


Cammie Heflin said...

Omg!!! You KNOW THAT'S MY FAVORITE!!! I'm so excited for this venture!!! Live you both dearly!

Claudia said...

Oh, how cool is that? We have that show in Germany as well and I watched in once. Congrats on that!

Anonymous said...

And I know that not being able to be home in the areas you mention weighs heavily on Mark's mind. This is the father who slept in the hospital each night when his youngest was receiving chemo treatments. You spent all day there Heather battling for Zoey and Mark was there each nite sleeping on a window bed.. Like two ships passing in the night. My hat is off to both of you.

Mark congrats on the show, and as I've mentioned to you I'm just waiting for the day when I go to the movie theater and your name appears on the screen for everyone to see.
Good luck with "The Biggest Loser", I know you will do an awesome job.

Aunt Bluebelle

Anonymous said...

Congrats Mark and you go kick butt. That is a great show. Heather, I'm glad you shared your gratitude about how lucky Mark is to have a great job to support his family and health benefits. Think of the many families who might have similar situations as far as having young children who are active or have challenges and the husband does not have a job. I was a widow at 29 with a newborn three months after my husband died. I maintained a job, luckily had my mom and then my sister take care of my son while I worked until he was three and then put him in all-day daycare. At night I picked up my son, took care of him and I didn't have a husband to help or even to talk to. Be thankful, and I know you are, that Mark does come home after a grueling day and I'm sure, helps in whatever way he can besides putting food on the table and keeping the needs of his family as his priority even though he physically can't be two places at once.
My hat goes off to both of you. A stay-at-home mom has a tough job also but I think the bottom line is if you have a man who is a good provider you have to take the bitter with the sweet. Life is too short so enjoy the things you have and work together.
Bluebelle's friend

My name is Sarah said...

Yes, a job. It is important and maybe the hours suck, but what is great is the team you two are. You have made it work for you! Love that rock by the way. I just might have to steal it ok?

Bea Braun said...

We LOVE The Biggest Loser! What a wonderful accomplishment for Mark. You guys are amazing parents and an amazing couple and have embraced all that has come your way. This will be a new adventure!

Kristin said...

We must be twins in a former life. My hubby works strange random hours and we rarely sit down together for a meal either. I often think, dang this single mom thing is hard. And then I remember, oh yeah, I get to stay home with my kids. Single moms don't. They have to go to work. SOOO thankful for his job, too. Congrats on the Biggest Loser :)