Friday, April 24, 2009
"A Pair of Shoes" revisited .....
On the day of Zoey's official diagnosis, I posted this poem. I would have had no idea, on that very surreal, very terrifying day in late October, what this poem would actually come to mean to me and the new journey we were about to embark on. Almost 6 months later, I have learned more than any mother should ever have to learn. I have seen more than any mother should ever have to see. I have watched helplessly as other mothers endure more than any mother should ever be asked to endure. These things and a myriad of other feelings and emotions are far too complex to encapsulate in a simple posting. Suffice it to say, I am changed. Forever and irrevocably changed. I stand shoulder to shoulder with some amazing other mothers. Doing all we know how to do in these moments. Which is to continue to walk forward, into the unknown. Led only by unwavering faith in the inexplicable and guided only by the light of our magical children. Some children here with us, others guiding us from a place we can only imagine the beauty of. Today, I walk on ...
A Pair of Shoes
I am wearing a pair of shoes.
They are ugly shoes.
I hate my shoes.
Each day I wear them, and each
day I wish I had another pair.
Some days my shoes hurt so bad
that I do not think I can take
Yet, I continue to wear them.
I get funny looks wearing these shoes.
I can tell in others eyes that they
are glad they are my shoes and not
They never talk about my shoes.
To learn how awful my shoes are
might make them uncomfortable.
To truly understand these shoes
you must walk in them.
But, once you put them on, you can
never take them off.
I now realize that I am not the
only one who wears these shoes.
There are many pairs in this world.
Some women ache daily as they try
and walk in them.
Some have learned how to walk in
them so they don't hurt quite as much.
Some have worn the shoes so long that
days will go by before they think about
how much they hurt.
No woman deserves to wear these shoes.
Yet, because of these shoes I am a
These shoes have given me the strength
to face anything.
They have made me who I am.
I will forever walk in the shoes of a
woman who has a child with cancer.